It was nearly a year ago I was finishing a retreat on the Osa Peninsula of Costa Rica, a month of deep reflection, inner work, and appreciation for the importance of catching up on much needed personal time.
I remember leaving there feeling more connected to the importance of discipline, ritual, silence, and rest.
I appreciate how that time and space has supported the amount of vitality I’ve experienced this year. As I move into a new cycle I find myself reflecting on how immensely grateful I feel that I found these practices and for the enormous impact they have made on the quality of my life.
As most of you know, I have a history of personal trauma, having survived a form of emotional and psychological abuse that sometimes occurs in long-term relationships. This abuse pattern is just beginning to be recognized, studied, and understood…it doesn’t necessarily show on the outside but is known to contribute to chronic long-term health problems.
I founded BodyAttune shortly after finding the courage to leave that relationship. At the time I felt worthless, useless, exhausted, and afraid. But I believed in the practices and the possibility for something better. So I sank my teeth in and did the work, both personally and professionally, to grow and heal and thrive beyond my wildest dreams.
I discovered so much in the process, and including how hard I was pushing myself. At some point I came to realize that I could let go of the struggle and simply let my body rest and heal. The worst was over and I had finally built my dream practice.
I realized there had been a constant negative inner dialogue that was no longer present, coming from an environment that I was no longer in.
I discovered that I was enough.
To be able to have basic core practices like meditation, movement, and energy work to ground me and stabilize during the tough moments has been a true blessing.
I have seen these practices support many individuals, not only from similar circumstances, but through the stresses of life in general, that we all experience in our own unique, individual way.
In this past month, I had moments when the feeling of exhaustion crept in and I noticed feeling worried that maybe another storm was coming, that maybe I was not through the worst after all.
But then I realized that I had been juggling many very stressful experiences simultaneously all while continuing to thrive in my personal life and practice: I relocated my office while also handling quite a few significant personal life events. I continued to support my regular client load, while working to add and develop new services and programs…
This particular feeling is the kind of fatigue that comes from a fully-lived life of growth, expansion, and opportunity. That it’s nothing like what I used to feel. And I celebrate that!
It is my pleasure to share this work with you all, and I appreciate your presence immensely.